http://media.blubrry.com/timefortheshow/p/hypercubelaboratory.com/podcasts/0136TFTS20180917.mp3Podcast: Play in new window | DownloadSubscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | Google Play | TuneIn | RSSDo you not…
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You’re going to SHIT YOUR FACE IN HALF when you hear this one! Reverand [sic] peas [sic] didn’t show up to this episode, probably because it’s Labor Day and he got too shit-housed to do the show — BUT THAT’S OKAY, because Doktor Cosmac, the Cheap Engineer of Hypercube Labs, joins Faux & Fidd for the entire show and officiates this week’s “Is It a Band” with guest contestant, Cat Feather! Fidd teaches the kids what NOT to do by emptying the contents of a road flare onto a paper plate and snorting it…again. Doktor Faux reminds you what that really funny joke was that you thought of that one time, but forgot. Elon Musk calls in to admit that he’s an unused Hideo Kojima villain who escaped into the real world.
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You are going to SHIT YOUR FACE when you hear this episode. This week’s magic phrase is “Nariff Nariff Barungaroo”. Doktor/Engineer/Doktor Faux is running the show from Hypercube HQ all by his lonesome while Fidd Chewley calls in from Tampa and Reverand [sic] peas [sic] calls in from his desert hidey-hole. The hosts attempt to play a new game, “That’s Racist”, but peas has to be a crybaby about the rules, so the game is abandoned in favor of the tried-and-true game, “Is It a Band”. The militantism of tennis ball-boys and executive chefs is explained. Fidd Chewley wins the Kenny Floyd Memorial Award for most drunken podcruster. The entire second hour of the show is spent speculating on what kind of dress what’s-her-tits is going to wear to the royal wedding.
This episode is sponsored by Flo-tato: the official life-preserver of the sovereign nation of Ireland. You are going to SHIT YOUR OWN FACE when you hear this episode. Elon Musk calls in to tell us why he’ll never call in to our show. Things may not be going ideally for you, but at least your nipples don’t look like pieces of half-chewed gum. Inspector Gadget is revealed to be a go-go-gadget racist! Reverend Scalpod returns to officiate this week’s round of “Is It a Band?”. Fidd and peas have a rare moment of mutual appreciation of each other’s choices for this week’s Blind Eye segment. Dok Faux basically shakes his head and reevaluates his life LIVE ON THE AIR. The militantism of tennis ballboys is revealed to be the future of the United States of Florida.
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In this episode, Fidd Chewley once again intentionally gets caught by “To Catch a Predator” in his ongoing investigation, “To Catch a Predator Catcher”, and you’ll NEVER BELIEVE the AGGRESSIVELY PREDICTABLE CONCLUSION!! Professional Hopscotch referee, Doktor Cosmac, joins the show halfway through to satisfy government-mandated psychological diversity requirements. Reverand [sic] peas [sic] delivers an overly-long, underly-cautious PSA. Fidd delivers a PSA of his own: if you don’t do drugs, then drugs will do YOU. Doktor Faux doesn’t understand either PSA and demands to be mansplained to. Peas defends his championship in our new game, “Is It a Band”. We hereby apologize to our sponsors for forgetting to mention them during the show AGAIN: Adderall PM, Johnson & Johnson Human Growth Hormone, and the Make-a-Wish Foundation (please don’t tell them I’m not terminally ill).
HOLY SHIT, EVERYONE — IT’S TIME FOR THAT THING THEY CALL A “SHOW”! It’s Doktor/Engineer/Doktor Faux, Reverand [sic] peas [sic], and Fidd Chewley this week in their endless campaign to preserve endangered jokes from extinction! If we don’t tell these jokes, the WHO WILL?! We play our new game, “Is It a Band”. Dok Faux drops a MOAB on peas’s invented religion by showing that it was already invented. Fidd explains why bagpipe players get all the pus*y. The esoteric procedure & methodology of stirring hot dog food is expounded and elaborated upon. Faux’s other gallbladder is a Mercedes. Fidd resolves a long-standing philosophical impasse by explaining that bad things ONLY happen to good people because they’re good things when they happen to bad people. The benefits of faking cardiac arrest in front of your dog are explored. Now that you’ve read this entire episode description, you are no longer required to listen to the episode. Please delete it now.